So here I am writing this blog to say hey look at me...moving on with my living... living life only as I can live it... loving, happiness, joy bliss...loving that fact that this world can still be my oyster...then it happens.!
In an instant your life has changed...I can't really believe I am sharing this, but I just learned that my Mom has cancer...Yes I said it my mom...first me and now her...what is happening...what is happening????? How am I supposed to deal with this too... what, what, what, what, what am I supposed to do...? Okay yes I have the tools...I've been here my self before...but this time I'm in the chair and she is on the table...I am wise...in the sense that I know the questions to ask...but in asking those questions I am not getting the answer's I want to hear.
Okay the good news my mom is 61 not 41 or 26...so this kind of thing happens as you get older...okay I can deal with that... but her cancer is different in that it has the possibility of spreading. Of course we don't know all of the answers yet... but damn it, damn it, damn it!
Am I numb?... well not really... I can still feel, but can I express those feelings in a way you would understand them to find some comfort... probably not...am I comforted well in a way... I am proud that I can be a sounding board for my mother if she needs me... Truth is I have never met anyone who's had cancer before their mom did... what the hell is that... and when asked does it run in the family well Hell I guess sooo....!
I fully intended on coming on today and writing about a valuable lesson I learned this weekend about men and blah blah blah... the truth is none of that Shit matters... life is of the utmost importance... and holding on to that life is even more important...Bills, house, car, job none of it matters. The thing that matters most it's what's in front of you...and that's living life to the fullest... AT ALL TIMES!
I will say this...there are a lot of things that I could be feeling right now.. and this particular blog may not make any sense...but hey I needed to get it out... and well maybe this isn't the one that is witty or full of hope... maybe this one just is!
However, if you asked me how I'm doing... I couldn't tell ya... cause I have no earthly idea!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You know how you're doing. You're writing about it. I know, I know. Why can't I just read your blog and shut up? Well one of the pleasures of blogging is reading the comments that people leave for you. Check out www.thesitsgirls.com to think about getting more traffic to your site if you're interested in more readers. XOXO. Have a great Tuesday.
ReplyDelete