I guess I should explain... right before I got cancer I was this size, I worked out hard... I ate right.. didn't really drink...but still I got cancer...! Then 3 years and 5 surgeries later I ballooned to a size that I had no idea I could get to, my body changed drastically... I was devistated, depressed, and then I said Fuck it... if doing all the right things got me cancer then I'm gonna do all the bad things.
I have to say I have let my weight be a safety blanket...the thing that I once despised I allowed to be my shield from the world...I became too comfortable... its one thing to accept where you are at the moment... but it is a far more important to accept and then continue to move on... I have to say I miss this... I miss this body, I miss the energy I had the way I felt...! I want this back... so it is my intent to get it.
I am going to mix a little bit of the old with the new... I must say... I am forever changed by what happened to me... so the mentality of the girl you see in this photo is totally different than who I am today... but there are aspects of her that I want to remember, and re-capture!
Long enough have I sat in this place...I even went as far to say that I booked more things this size then I ever had....that may be true...but it doesn't have to do with size...it's my mentality... I am a changed person... I walk proudly into my destiny with no fear... I have survived cancer...If I can do this I can do anything.! So here I go on a new journey of health and wealth...!
You still look hot NNN, wow another blog award! How cool are you my dear? Jael is a cool chick too, I love her blog. Kudos!!!
ReplyDeleteHere's an extra comment.
ReplyDeleteNikea I'd like to introduce you to Megan Edelstein @ http://spiritjump.blogspot.com and @ http://cancerlost.blogspot.com Do you remember I've been telling you about Megan for weeks now.
Kisses to both of you beautiful ladies for kicking cancer's ass!!!
And you're STILL beautiful! INSIDE AND OUT!
ReplyDeleteDenise B
NNN,
ReplyDeleteGlad to see you finally made it over to Megan's blog.
Megan we're waiting for you now... (tick, tick, tick) But no pressure :-)
Thank you for visiting my blog ;) I would absolutely LOVE if you would like to write a guest post on mine. I have a section called Fellow Fighters. Let me know what you think and if you would be interested. My email is megse5@netscape.net and if you want to do the post just send it to that address with a picture.
ReplyDeleteNot sure if you saw but I also have a NPO called Spirit Jump (www.spiritjump.org) our members send cards & gifts to people battling cancer. Thought you might be interested in becoming a member and/or blogging about it
Hope to hear from you soon!
I see that you have finally visited each others blogs, yaaay to Nikea and Megan. I'm happy to have made this connection between two beautiful women.
ReplyDeleteOkay just call me "people who meet people."
ReplyDeleteNNN, please read this article from a friend of a friend just emailed to me this morning. I want it to encourage you to keep writing... XOXO!!
http://www.beaumont.k12.tx.us/vision/2009-10-20-vision.pdf
You are gorgeous -- now and then! As a woman with cancer as well, sometimes it's hard enough to get through the day, much less trying to exercise and all that -- so I try not to keep 'shoulding' on myself and cut myself some slack....though not too much....hang in there...
ReplyDelete